Looking Out for One Another

Essex Senior League wants to pause and recognise something bigger than football, the well-being of everyone in our community.

Whether you are a spectator cheering from the touchline, a player giving your all on pitch, a coach, an official, or a volunteer who keeps things running behind the scenes - YOUR mental health matters!

This period is equally as stressful as it is enjoyable, with the worries of what to get people, how you're going to cook or accommodate family and friends, all striving for that 'perfect' Christmas experience ... it's exhausting!

And there's no such thing as a perfect Christmas or a perfect life, life is challenging for us all at some point in our lives ... and it's then that we need our support network around us.

This period marks the anniversary of Gary Speed's passing, a heartbreaking reminder of how even those who seem strong, successful, and admired may be silently struggling.

His legacy encourages us to look out for one another with more compassion, more honesty, and more willingness to talk.

Everything always seems worse in the Winter months, there is something to be said about Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), the days are short, the nights are long, dark and cold ... no wonder we can get down.

I'm sure there is actually scientific research out there that states it's 'a thing' and that it's really to do with lack of daylight hours! We go to work when it's dark and we come home when its dark!

Stress, loneliness, financial worries, grief, or uncertainty around job security can be amplified at this time of year.

Football brings us together, but it doesn't protect us from personal struggles. What it can do is create a space where people feel supported and connected.

Even small gestures within our clubs, checking in with teammates, asking a volunteer how they are doing, or taking a moment to speak with a parent standing alone at the sidelines - can make a meaningful difference!

No one really knows what's going on in someone's life unless they talk about it, showing interest and kindness might be the only nice thing that happens to them that day but it shows people that you care and are interested in them - that one act of kindness could mean so much to someone who's not at their best, at any time of year but more so at this time of year.

If You're Finding Things Difficult

You are not alone, and you don't have to keep everything to yourself.

Talking to someone you trust - another play, your coach, a friend, family member - can be the first important step to resolving whatever is troubling you.

It is a sign of courage and strength - not weakness, to speak up, you are stronger than you think but also, everyone needs a little support from time to time.

We need to stop thinking about mental health as a stigmatised issue, something to be ashamed of - and think of it more as we do physical health.

When you don't feel right physically, you see a doctor or pharmacist, seek help ... the same applies to your mental health ... EVERYONE has good and bad days, EVERYONE!

If you feel you can't open up to someone close just yet, there are confidential, professional support networks available

Samaritans text 116 123 (free, 24/7) or email jo@samaritans.org

Mind - mind.org.uk

SHOUT - text SHOUT to 85258 for free 24/7 crisis text support

CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) - 0800 58 58 58 or thecalmzone.net

NHS 111 - for urgent mental health help

If you are in immediate danger or thinking of harming yourself, please call 999 or go to A&E without delay.

Everyone in our football community has a role to play in creating a culture where people feel safe to talk.

Check in with those around you

A simple 'How's things?' can open the conversation

If someone seems quieter than usual, more withdrawn, or just not themselves, trust your instincts and ask if they're ok.

Listen without judgment

You don't need to have all or any of the answers. Being present, and listening can be the support someone needs.

If a teammate, family member or colleague shares something difficult, gently encourage them to reach out to friends, family or professional support.

Create a team culture where well-being comes first

Yes, we all like to win a game of football! Yes, we are competitive! But underneath that, we are all just trying to live our lives as best we can.

Opening up the discussion on mental and physical health in the dressing room helps to make everyone feel more able to speak up.

The most powerful way we can honour Gary Speed's legacy is to make sure no one in our own community feels they have to struggle in silence.

Football is at its best when we stand together.

This season, and every season, let's look after each other with the same commitment we show on the pitch.

If you're struggling - please reach out.

If you notice someone else might be, please check in.

You never know the difference a single conversation might make.

A final thought - it's not only those who are quiet and reserved who are struggling, the Norwich City FC video below, clearly shows that.

https://youtu.be/tX8TgVR33KM